Going mad over opportunity costs

I need stronger mental kung-fu. I've burned a hole in my wallet when my dark spendthrift half got the better of mister penny-pincher. Central Jean Claude (the part of me that knows and sees everything I do) might be able to give a reason why I did what I did but he's not actually available for consultation (he never is).

Okay, last Friday was declared a holiday for high school and college students so they could go and register for the SK elections. I don't really care about it and I'll probably not vote like I did during the senatorial elections. Anyway, it was a Friday, I was stuck at home with nothing to do. I had just splurged on books the other day, I could go and read those. Problem was: I was stricken with wanderlust. The Friday felt too much like a Saturday. I was at home, bumming around, and it brought bad memories of how I bummed my last summer break away. I was also itching to get a Talecraft deck. And there, I decided on going out to mallrat by myself.

I thought of Trinoma and of exploring the mall's supposed labyrinthine interiors. It wouln't be my first time to go there since I watched The Simpsons Movie there with the twins and Gene Paul, but I never really got to see the mall since we just got there in time to have pizza, watch the movie, and go home since it was already closing time. I remember that the mall was still pretty bare, there were still spaces with absolutely no shops in them and, for a mall, it felt empty. The mall's center reminded me of Glorietta and Isettan. Glorietta because of the playground and the overall set-up, Isettan because of kids riding goofy-looking mechanical animals. Derrick, the twin taking up architecture, brought attention to the bathroom tile floors and asked why they didn't just use concrete or larger tiles. After the movie, the guys, having gone to Trinoma before, pointed me to the garden area. It was cute, it was nice, there was a Starbucks in the middle of it, and too bad the fountains were already switched off. I would've seen jets of water playing follow-the-leader all around that area and it would've been fun to look at, but as I've said they were switched off at the time. Hearing all about the fountains and stuff, I came up with the thought that Ayala just spent everything on the fancy-schmancy (but nice) garden, and didn't have enough money left for decent floor tiles, hence the bathroom tile flooring.

But this post shouldn't be about Trinoma, it's about me needing to be a better penny-pincher

Okay, I decided on going to Trinoma and was all set to go there, but when I saw that SM City was having a sale I had second thoughts. I looked at the crowd going to Trinoma and the crowd heading to SM. Trinoma would still be crowded since it still had that new-mall appeal (bad memories of SM San Lazaro's opening), and I got out of the house with the thought of buying something. I headed toward SM.

There, I went to my usual haunts:Fully Booked, Comic Quest, Filbars, Courtside, Quantum, Comic Alley, and Booksale. I just ogled at books and manga I couldn't afford at Fully Booked; browsed but didn't buy anything from Comic Quest (and they didn't have Talecraft); checked out cards at Filbars and bought a set of Sage Owl, a set of Mana Tithe, and two Merfolk Thaumaturgists (yay budget cards!); checked Courtside if they had Talecraft (they didn't); watched the unique people dancing and hanging out in Quantum (I didn't play); checked out animè at Comic Alley (they were having a buy 2 take 1 sale); and hunted books at Booksale. I didn't find any books that day, the fates must have thought that I spent too much on books that week.

Tired, thirsty, and hungry, I went to the supermarket and got me some chips and a liter of Green Tea C2. Going to SM might have been a bad idea. There was nothing there and the crowds were thick because of the sale. I looked at my watch, 7 'o clock. I still had time to go to Trinoma and do some exploring. I was about to get on my way when I remembered that I haven't asked Filbars if they had Talecraft. I went upstairs and asked, they showed me the plain but elegant box of cards. I looked inside my wallet, I had enough money for it, but I'll essentially be paralyzed for the rest of the weekend, should I or should I not? I'd have to be pretty thrifty for the next week if I did buy it. What if something came up and I had to spend money for school stuff? But with the way the week went, it seemed that now is the perfect time to spend. Argh.

I bought the damn deck of cards.

I left the cramp store thinking: I have Talecraft, I have Talecraft, I'm pretty broke, I'm pretty broke, I have Talecraft.

I'm still patting myself on the back and at the same time, kicking myself in the head for splurging even after a few days have gone by from the day I did the deed. Talecraft turned out to be a fun game and was even more enjoyable when played with friends. I still splurged big time.

Okay, I might have exaggerated a little and I'm probably not making any sense anymore, but the point is that I'm starting to see that when I really like something, and I mean the kind of like that has you thinking about it every other minute, I'll actually go out and do it. It wouldn't matter if it was an actual need or a useless want, my mental defenses won't hold out when something reaches a certain desirability level and if I see that the means to get it are available. I remember Reighben telling me about finding my muse so that I'll get motivated and productive already. I'd have to be able to see things in the long run first before I can go chase my dreams. I don't like where this paragraph is going, I feel like it's going to lead to a corny epiphany that everybody can already see from a mile away. Abort seemingly useless epiphany? I'll just think it over in the nice private recesses of my mind and spare you the cheesiness.

Anyway, am I right in feeling guilty for spending money or do I just need to get used to giving expensive rewards to myself? I'm fretting over opportunity costs here.